So you have just turned 36 years old. A good portion of society will assure you that now you fit into the wrong side of 30 category. By this stage of ones life you should be settled into a happy marriage with kids and a mortgage to boot. Great for some but not for all.
In recent years I have stumbled over some friends who have been intent on achieving the goals of the big four. Marriage, house, mortgage and kids. In no particular order. It’s what we are taught from a young age. To be successful in life you need to tick off the big four otherwise you face being labelled a failure. But why is our society so structured?
Some fifteen years ago now I met an Englishman who, at the time was in his early fifties and had just settled in Australia. What had me fascinated by this foreign character was his outlook on life. As a young boy he had dropped out of school at the age of fourteen (a common trait for young people at the time) and taken to his love of painting to earn enough money for food and rent. At sixteen he moved to Germany and in the following years busked and worked his way through many countries where his passion for travel opened his eyes to the world around him.
What made John so special to me at the time was his motivation for living. He enjoyed doing what he loved. Painting was his passion and he utilised his passion to fund his way around the world. He lived a rich and full life where he had met many wonderful people and enjoyed sublime experiences that would stay with him forever. He never fussed over money or material possessions. John was simply a wonderful man and a major influence on me. In the short period I knew him I learned a great lesson. Always do what makes you happy.
We are born free spirits. As children we are bestowed with fanciful dreams that life is our oyster and we can achieve amazing highs. Then we progress to high school and tertiary education where, at this stage we are introduced to rules and laws at every turn. We can’t do this. We can’t do that. We can’t go there. We can’t say that. It all starts to become a repetitive act of control. The big four then come into play where our parents and teachers remind us at regular intervals of how important it is the achieve the big four or face the doom and gloom of failure in life.
By our early to mid twenties we are faced with the realisation that it is time to give up chasing your dreams and doing what you love doing. Or is it?
I chose from a young age to always do what I love doing. I have been lucky in so many respects however luck tends to follow the brave. It is never easy explaining why I do what i do in life to some. They often seem unable to compute that by kicking against the pricks I am actually better off as a person. I see rules and regulations as constrictive and unnecessary elements of life we don’t need. If you are going to have rules in your life then make your own. Don’t conform to the masses and the pressures of what your family, friends and peers expect of you.
To be a happier person you need to sit down and write up a list of exactly what it is that makes you happy. Once completed set about a plan of attack on how you are going to achieve these goals. Some may not be easily attainable however I strongly feel that if you want something bad enough in life you will get it. If you fail to obtain your goals the first time, then keep trying. You will get there in the end.
Think ahead of where you would like to be when you hit the age of 30 or 40 or 50 and so on. What will make you truly happy? There is no time like the present to start planning a happier life and an enjoyable future. Find out what you love doing today and set the wheels in motion.
Tomorrow is for those who can hear it coming……..